Q&A
Q. Neither my fiancé nor I grew up in the city where we now live. He works for a local restaurant that has offered us a big discount on our reception, so I'm tempted to have the wedding here. But my fiancé says it's rude to ask both of our large families to travel to us. What's your take?

A. Your fiancé has a valid point. It's not necessarily a matter of rudeness, but of trying to make things easier for your guests. Start by sitting down together and first deciding on the size and type of wedding you'd like to have. If you want a big family celebration, you and your fiancé may agree that it would be more convenient for the majority of the guests if you have the wedding in one of your hometowns. On the other hand, if you decide you'd prefer a smaller, more intimate affair (meaning fewer guests would have to travel), then your best bet may well be to have your party in your fiancé's restaurant. There's also the option of having a small wedding where you live now, then following it up with a family reception in one—or both—of your hometowns at a later date.

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Peggy Post

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